My Revelation

"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul." Psalm 143:8

Today God has shown me something, maybe I should call it a vision, but it is clear as mud to me. I saw before me a board, a playing field of sorts with players on it. If I stretched out my right hand I found my aunt Ann. Just in front of me slightly to the left is my cousin Deborah. Slightly in front of her to her left is my other cousin Charmaine and if I stretch out my left hand on the same level as Ann is her sister Rene who is also Deborah's mom.

Before I carry on, let me give you a little glimpse into my past. Deborah and Charmaine have both been sexually molested by their grandfather a long time ago. I don't know if this was the start but from here a string of molestations have rippled down the generations. I am not sure about the other branches of the family as I can only speak about what has happened to me. My step dad molested me and my siblings Theresa and Anthony. Theresa took him to court where he admitted guilt and was let off on a suspended sentence. When I was much older I prayed that I this generation thing would be broken. Later both Anthony and my step-dad were accused of molesting Theresa's daughter Danielle. Well now you know some of my history let me get back to the vision.

This is what I saw before me, these four ladies Ann, Deborah, Charmaine and Rene. Both Ann and Deborah are larger than the others for some reason. God drew me to each of these people. I poured out prayers and petitions for each one.

I saw Ann behind a pane of glass but she could not see the glass. Her glass had been coloured with the colour of her past experiences. She sees everything in life through that glass. She sees what she sees and can not comprehend what the other people on the board tell her what they see. I pray that the Holy Spirit will break the glass. That it will be a paradigm shift in her world. God laid it on my heart that she is strong on the outside but her fragile world will crumble if the glass is broken. She will need someone beside her and I sense that God is preparing someone to be that person.

Now Deborah is also seeing the world through her own glass pane. The hurt she has experienced in her past has coloured her glass in a different colour. Although her past has been dealt with, she still cannot see the coloured glass in front of her. She is angry and finds it hard to accept that Ann sees it all differently than her. The only time someone will see the glass in front of them is when it is shattered or scratched. I pray that God helps her to see her glass; that God would soften her heart to accept that others may not see the same things in the same colour.

Charmaine has also been hurt in the same way as Deborah. But where Deborah has turned to God to find comfort, Charmaine has turned away. It makes me sad to see how the action of one can affect a lot of people. Her glass is full of the colour of pain and rejection. I pray that she finds God and forgiveness. The grace of God will cover all.

Rene has accepted the pain of her daughter. The colour of her glass has been tainted to the same colour of Deborah's but it is darker. She blames herself and is angry with her late father and with God. She is trying to cope in her own way. I pray that God will tear down those patched up walls that she has build around her for protection and that she would accept Jesus and let Him build a strong tower around her.

All this is what God showed me.

Whatever the reason, I felt that I had to write it down. I have no understanding of how God is going to use this but God has never disappointed me in the past.

Finally I pray that the blood of Jesus will cover all the players on this board including myself as I am on that board too.